All paths are valid. Period. Even ones I judge as ridiculous and would never do. There is no universal best way. There is a best way for you at this moment in your life. You and I can uncover that no matter where you are on your meditation journey.
Judgements, which are just opinions not universal truths, are useful for discovering your way right now.
Meditation is a self-knowledge, presence practice, who’s ultimate goal is 24/7 presence. This is more than a spiritual exercise, it’s a life skill. It’s not for finding peace. It’s for finding you.
Many come to meditation to find peace, calm, focus, and/or quiet in the storm. In the beginning you will be confronted with why you are not that… in vivid, gory detail. Don’t worry. It’s normal. We’ve all been there. In fact we’re all still t(here), standing strong and happy to help.
Once you understand the container (of meditation), you can’t do it wrong. One super common example: many meditators think they’re doing it wrong because they can’t stop thinking. Man, is that a tough one. Much like your heart beating, your brain will keep thinking as long as you are alive. Congratulations. You’re not dead. :)
Your meditation is fine. Keep practicing.
Your practice will facilitate personal evolution and will evolve as you evolve. Your judgements, i.e. your opinions, will evolve also. Let that sink in a bit… and you begin to understand why cultivating (any kind of) self knowledge is useful for growth.
Forcing yourself to practice or procrastinating are usually signs that needs are not being met. Meet the needs. The practice will follow. (I can only offer limited help with this. Make sure that you have a mental health professional you can contact if things get too hairy. Seriously. See below.)
This is a practice of opening your eyes, not falling asleep. Life is hard (in this time-space). Meditation doesn’t take the challenges away – it makes you see the challenges clearly. If you want to be anesthetized then watch TV, take drugs, get (stay?) addicted to your phone. Even if you go sit in a cave, you still have to deal with you, which is the most challenging part of all. Fun, huh? :)
Start where you are, and build from there. You’ll improve over time and stay motivated. People who set goals that are too big, get disillusioned and abandon ship. You’re welcome to do that, it’ll just take longer to get to where you want to be. You wouldn’t expect yourself to start lifting with a 50kg weight, why expect yourself to start with a crazy hard practice schedule? If you start at a reasonable place, you’ll advance quickly. (I get it. I learned this one the hard way.)
Quality over Quantity. I’d rather you practice 2 minutes with clear intentions on your commute than sit in silence for an hour not really knowing what you’re doing.
I don’t need you to believe what I believe. Far from it. Our differences help us evolve. It’s inspiring. I’ll judge you and you’ll judge me. That’s ok. That’s how we become conscious of our opinions.
I do need you to be ok that my chosen beliefs are wild and wacky. We don’t have to agree with each other, we just need to be ok having different truths. Being uniquely beautiful souls.
I’m deeply spiritual. I believe that everything (and non-thing) is made from the fabric of Source. You and me, murderers and saints, rocks and trees, joy and pain, thoughts and emotions, body and spirit. I’m a big ball of all of that. So are you. The point here isn’t perfection. The point is being clear-eyed, awake to who we are, present to every(non)thing inside and out… and eventually knowing that’s one and the same (non)thing.
Welcome.
Contact me for classes: Elena at ElenaFoucher.com
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“Meditation isn’t about trying to throw ourselves away and become something better. It’s about befriending who we are.”
Pema Chödrön, Tibetan Buddhist Nun, Teacher, Author