Change can be destabilizing and difficult on every level.
Our self-care practices, on the other hand, can help us recenter and navigate change with more ease.
change
Enjoying Where You Are
(video 4:13) Ever really wanted the future to come true because the present didn’t seem as shiny? I’m moving to a new country soon and boy would that be easy! I could focus on all of the things that are “better” there and really ferment dislike for all of the things that I don’t like here. It’s really tempting to think that change is for the better and therefore the present isn’t as good as the future will be…
And does that help you enjoy where you are right now? And if you stay in that mindset, does it help you enjoy the future when the future becomes right now, your present?
How to Deal with Discomfort
Feeling too uncomfortable to practice?
That’s normal!
You don’t have to practice if you don’t want to!
And when you feel ready, take a few minutes and simply notice what comes up. Be present to whatever happens.
You may notice yourself…
not wanting to think or feel whatever you’re thinking or feeling. Keep noticing that. Stay with it. Stay present. Remember that whatever you are thinking or feeling will change eventually. EVERYTHING does. And if you stay present with it, and don’t try to change or fix it, it will naturally change (on it’s own) even faster.
You may notice yourself…
diving into the stories around why you are thinking and feeling those things. You may notice yourself adding fuel and building up the pain! Keep noticing that. Stay present, simply observing yourself doing that. It will change on it’s own eventually, especially if you stay present and just notice versus try to change or fix it. And if you do start changing or fixing it, simply notice THAT!
It is the noticing that is the key. The more you can simply notice, the more you allow whatever is here to be here. If you try to change or fix, inevitably you repress it and that locks it into place. Things that we’re repressing, we are holding and thus we can’t let go of them. If you can wait it out, simply observing, you will reach a point where you don’t need to repress any of it and your innate wisdom will surface with the answer for how to solve what ever is happening. It will not feel like repression or denial. You won’t feel that you need to make it stop. Instead, you will see the wisdom of what is happening, the undercurrents and the reasons and often the situation will reveal itself as useful and helpful… it will usually naturally end at that point.
Eventually, you may cultivate the willingness to notice whatever you are thinking and feeling… Not because you like it or want to be thinking or feeling whatever you are thinking and feeling… Simply because it is here. You will stay present because you will know the wisdom of this process.
Play with it and see if this works for you.
The Failure Challenge
This is a challenge to reframe failure…
Next time you reach a moment of failure, see if you can reframe it as a moment to reassess what you’re doing and where you are going.
If you’re failing that means you are doing something, so what have you learned? How have you changed? What can you do better now? And has your goal changed?
Failure is a chance to see how you’ve evolved, upgrade what you’re doing and let your goals evolve as you do.
Enjoy!,
Elena
Speaking From the Heart: Feeling with Every Cell
Speaking From the Heart: Acknowledging Fear Isn't Cultivating Fear
(video) How do we acknowledge fear with out cultivating more of it?
Speaking From the Heart: Choosing Happiness
Broken to Joy: Practicing with the Little Waves
Broken to Joy: Do You Focus On Fear or Fun
(video) Many of us have a strong habit of focusing on fear… on controlling, fixing, finding fault, etc. Once we realize that we can choose to focus on fun… the first step is noticing!
Broken to Joy: The Pain Isn't Me
(video) Sometimes in the middle of turmoil it helps to remember that my thoughts and feelings are things. They are objects. That I am separate from them.
Elena
theJoyLab.net